Galway Player almost definitely a virgin says top psychologist

GALWAY: NUI Galway’s top clinical psychologist claimed today that the blogger operating under the pseudonym ‘the Galway Player’ is likely a socially awkward introvert who is “almost definitely” a virgin.

Dr. Sinead Donnelly said: “The author of the blog has clearly based his persona on the type of ‘player’ you often come across in American sitcoms – think Joey in Friends, Charlie in Two and a Half Men or Barney in How I Met Your Mother, there is no evidence of any basis in reality. It is highly likely that far from being a player, a man who feels the need to hold down this level of delusion cannot even sustain an erection.”

She added: “The cloak of anonymity allows him to indulge in a fantasy where all women want him and all men want to be him. It’s like a comfort blanket for a man who has clearly been rejected one time too many – unfortunately, in many cases like this, the line between reality and delusion can become more and more blurred as time goes on.”

Aoife O’Brien, who says she lived with the blogger during her second year of University appeared to back up these claims in an interview today. She said: “He would get up in the morning talking about the bird he pulled the night before. He used to make a big deal of saying he’d sent her on the walk of shame early, but we literally never once saw him with a girl. He’d make small talk with us for a few minutes over a cup of tea and then head away again for a suspiciously long shower.”

Aoife’s boyfriend Pa Holian agreed.”It’s like this – if you’re that much of a stud, you don’t spend your time sitting at your laptop blogging – you’re too busy out getting action” he said, as he glanced somewhat wistfully at his girlfriend of eight months.

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